For Newly Reverts: I Share Because I Care

So this is one of my posts back when I was a bit younger. Heh.

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Published: 5th of October 2010

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Assalamualaikum wbt. This is a special entry for newly reverts, and also for you who thought of reverting but hesitates due to certain reasons. Before i begin, i am also a revert since 14th of November 2008(which is the date i reverted). I am a Sarawakian and i am a Melanau, formerly a Christian of the Roman Catholic church. I am nearly 20 years old, which means i reverted when i was 18. Now, i guess that's all generally about me. Now, i shall begin with the sharing session.

1. CHANGING THE NAME

Thanks to the stereotype set by the media and God knows how many other unreliable resources, we thought that once we make the decision to revert, we have to change our name into arabic name etc. However, changing the name is not necessary. It is optional. For your information, you can keep your father's name too. Its not compulsory that our name have to end with Abdullah. The reason for me changing my name is because i thought, i MUST change it. Back then, i was not informed. I think that it is compulsory. But anyway, now i knew that changing my name is the right decision because my former name had no meaning and it was derived from an Indonesian pop singer(i know, i feel like laughing too). The only thing i regret was not knowing that i can keep my father's name. The reason why i think keeping your father's name is so that your reversion can maybe be more acceptable because most parents think that, once their son/daughter became a Muslim, they will disown themselves from the family. The usage of Abdullah has gathered a lot of misunderstanding among the revert parents. So, at least, by keeping your father's name, perhaps they will understand that when you left your previous religion, you did not leave them as well. InshaALLAH.

However, for those who didn't know about this before and already changed their name, don't regret your decision but learn to get used to it and make the most of it. Convince your parents that changing your name has nothing to do with your relationship with them and changing the name and religion will never affect the eternal bond between parents and child. Tell them Islam told us to be respectful and loving to our parents regardless of their religion and anything else.

This remind me of a story about a child and his parents. Click here to read>>

To those who kept their reversion a secret(like me), you can take your time. Not changing the IC doesn't mean that you're still a non-Muslim. Remember, as long as you are Islam at heart, nothing in this world can defy that. :)

2. TIPS WHEN GOING UNDERCOVER(at home)

• Not wearing the hijab(for girls) - Try not to be so affected by it. Think of it as your sacrifice temporarily. However, if you are away from home, and you are sure that it is safe, you may wear it again, the proper way. :)

• Non-halal foods- When your mom serves you pork or chicken that is not properly slaughtered, try not to eat it. But if your mom put it in your plate, and if they seem to stare at you to see if you're eating, take a bite. You can eat as long as 'tidak mengenyangkan'. This is a situation we call as 'darurat'/emergency. (sorry for the limited vocabs :P)

• Solat - Prayer by any means is compulsory. Like me, i pray using the blanket to cover up as a telekung and a clean towel for the sejadah. Note : Don't forget to lock your door.

• Internet browsing- For undercover reverts like us, our parents might check on our personal computer. Remember to delete your browsing history and also if you think that it's such a drag, browse privately. Also, don't download anything suspicious.

• Interrogation- Sometimes our parents may suspect something amiss when we suddenly behave strangely. Sometimes they might ask us cepumas questions like, you're not influenced by the Malays are you? That is an indirect question which means, You've reverted aren't you? Whatever they ask, take a moment into answering and maintain calm(though you can feel your heart thumping as if it's about to fall off), and answer by beating around the bush. You're not lying but in the same time, you're not telling the truth.

• Friends- Do not depend entirely on them when it comes to the matters of feelings and such. You may feel disappointed when they seldom contacted you. It is hard but it will be harder if we complicate our already vulnerable state with hoping on humans, mere humans like us. They too, like us, are bound to have problems. Also, if they couldn't understand you but keep saying things like "Stay strong." or "Be patient.", don't get upset because they are trying to understand us and those words are the doa from them. I know we will feel like, "Try being in my shoes. See how you react to that!" but you see, we must be positive in times like these. Believe me, you'll know soon enough exactly what i mean. :)

I guess that is all for now. Maybe there is something else that i forgot to mention but i'll update once i remember. For now, be strong and stay strong. InshaALLAH, everything will be fine after going through the pain. But remember, ALLAH made it hard for us because He wants to make it easy for us. All in all, you're not alone because ALLAH is always there.

Assalamualaikum.